You Reflect Me
by SuperiorEmo
Summary: (Highschool AU) For the past four years, Tris has been enemies with the popular boy in school, Four. The pair had never shared a decent moment with each other, so she thought. Expecting another year of torture, she's instead hit with a wave of confusion and emotion that she had never experienced, for anyone. Rated M for some harsh language and minor adult themes.
1. Set Me Free

**Monday**

**Tris POV**

Life in high school has never been easy for me. I'm a senior, and I've been bullied my whole high school experience, by the most popular kid, Four. I hated him for bullying me but I never found out what he has against me. Everyday I go to school and put a smile on my face, but struggle with the same thing everyday. I never look forward to school. But like everything else in my life, I deal with it. I hear the sound of the song Ocean Avenue by Yellowcard, which I really like, play through my phone. That would be my alarm which wakes me up every morning at 6:00 reminding me that I have to go to school. Great. I throw on some clothes; a shirt with the name of a band I used to like and some yoga pants. To sum it up, I kind of looked like shit. Mondays are the day I stop caring. Tomorrow I'll look nicer, try harder. I walk downstairs into the kitchen where my mother is cooking scrambled eggs, pancakes and bacon. I sit at the table and put my head in my hand. "You look nice," my mother laughed. "Don't I?" I joked. She put a plate down in front of me with a pancake, two strips of bacon and a small portion of eggs. I eat, my mother kisses my head, and I walk out the door with my older brother, Caleb. He wears a dark blue beanie, a gray sweatshirt, and jeans. **(A/N: He looks like Augustus, in the eulogy scene of TFiOS) **It's Fall right now, so the grass along the sidewalks are covered in beautifully colored leaves. I long to steal more moments like this when I can. There are too many I have let pass me by. We walk down the street together in mostly silence until he speaks up. "Don't let them be like that to you today." Caleb is the only one in my family who knows about my bullying problem. If anyone else knew, we would live in another state. "I know-" I start. Caleb stops in his tracks and cuts me off. "I mean ruin them." He says coldly. I didn't reply I just kept walking. I shrugged and I looked at my phone.

_2 missed FaceTime calls from Uriah_

_1 missed call from Will_

_Christina ( fashionlover_chris) tagged you in a photo_

_Lynn ( lynnspirational) liked your photo_

_Marlene ( marleanonme) started following you_

_2 new messages from Will_

_4 new messages from Christina_

I sighed and unlocked my phone

**Will:**

_Hey Tris (5:54 am)_

_forgot my pen I need one (6:17 am)_

**Christina:**

_TRIS! (6:02 am)_

_OMG! (6:02 am)_

_It's urgent. (6:04 am)_

_Hello? (6:07) _

**Tris:**_ what Chris?_

I clicked the phone off and stuck it in my pocket. Two minutes later it vibrated. "Hello?" "TRIS!" Christina yelled in my ear. I stopped going by Beatrice when I was 13, long before I knew Christina. She sounded like she was crying. "What is it?!" I asked nervously. "I broke my favorite heels!" She sobbed. "Oh god Chris, I thought somebody died!" I heard a laugh at the other end of the line. I should've expected that. "I'll talk to you at school," I said. I tapped the end call button. I stuck the phone in my pocket when we got close to the school. Caleb waved goodbye and I began going to the opposite wing of the building than him. My feet were kicked out from under me when I reached the stairs. "Oh hey, Stiff!" Four's friend Peter laughed. "You alright there?" He smirked. "Oh, fuck off, dick." I replied getting up and brushing myself off. "Oh, the Stiff's feisty today!" He said to his friend Drew. I ignored the comment and continued walking. Four shoved me into the lockers in the hallway. The lock dials dig into my back. "Great," I think. "I have 3 classes with this jerk." I saw Christina and we walked to advisory together. We sat next to each other and practically talked the whole time. Me and Christina split up when class ended and as soon as I walked into the hall, Peter and Drew shoved me hard. I hit another locker, making a loud noise against it. "You think you're funny, Stiff?" Peter said holding me against the locker by my throat. "PETER!" I hear Four yell. Great even more torture to be added on. He came over and my breath was running out. "Lay off." Four said. Huh? Four? Telling Peter to stop? That's weird. "Fine." Peter released his grip and dropped me. He walked off. "What was that?" I asked Four. "Did you want to die?" I didn't say anything and he walked off. I don't want to admit it, but he was right. The faculty at this school don't give a damn what happens, as long as you aren't dead! Hell, they could give two shits less if you were in a fucking coma. The nurses switch off between Ms. Reynaldo, who was really annoying and Nurse Phelps, she was cool. I had to be in Four's group in art. But Will and Uriah were in my group so it made it easier. I didn't speak to Four but he kept looking at me. Probably plotting the next thing to do to me. When art ended, Peter tripped me in the hall. Four walked by, but he didn't help. Normal.

**Four POV**

I helped the stiff today. I don't know why, but I just couldn't see her like that. I used to enjoy her pain. Whatever. When school ended I put on my red Beats by Dr. Dre and started walking home. I quickly scrolled through my playlist and tapped a song.

_May I have your attention, please? Will the real Slim Shady please stand up? I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up? We're going to have a problem here. _

I like Eminem a lot. His music made me feel pumped up for some reason. I checked my notifications.

_1 missed call from Zeke_

_3 new messages from Zeke_

**Zeke:**

_Four! Wsp my number?_

_Having a party Friday_

_U should totally come._

**Four:**_ K_

I clicked the phone off and walked into my house. My back stings from the last beating I got from my father. Thank god he isn't home for another two weeks. I couldn't stop thinking about what Peter did to the Stiff. I didn't even really like Peter, but I tell myself I don't like her either, I don't know what I feel anymore.

**Tris POV**

I walked home in silence with Caleb. When I got home, I ran upstairs and laid on my bed. My throat ached from where Peter grabbed me. I decided to text Christina.

**Christina**

_T: hey Chris_

_C: Trissy!_

_T: bleh. Trissy?_

_C: ya Trissy._

_T: whatever. Do you want to hear something crazy?_

_C: what?_

_T: it's four. He actually helped me_

_C: really? What did he do?_

_T: he got Peter away, he was choking me_

_C: wow_

_T: I know_

_C: tris omg _

_T: what?_

_C: four helped u._

_T: ik captain obvious_

_C: FOUR tho _

_T: I know Chris I gotta go_

_C: k :'(_

I really didn't need to go I just didn't want to talk anymore. I clicked off the iPhone and tossed it on my bed. It was about 6:00 now. I just went to sleep because there was nothing else to do. I woke up at about 6:30. Dammit. I went downstairs and ate dinner; chicken and peas. I didn't feel like talking so I went upstairs and this time I really fell asleep.

**Tuesday**

_There's a place off Ocean Avenue where I used to sit and talk with you..._

Time to get up. I took a shower because I went to sleep too early to do it last night. Today I put on a white blouse and black leggings with some high tops. I threw on the sweatshirt Will got me. It was plain grey with the faded white words 'abercrombie &amp; fitch' that were written across the chest. When it was unzipped it split in half. I picked up a chocolate chip muffin from the counter and ate it on my way to school. "Hey, be careful today." Caleb told me. He smiled. "I'll see you tomorrow morning?" I nodded and walked up the stairs without issue. Caleb had some sort of science convention in Michigan. I'm alone now. I walked into the school and someone grabbed my forearm. Four. "Let me go..." I mumbled. "Just because I saved your ass last time, doesn't mean I'll do it again, Stiff." He says. He lets go and walks away, but I still feel his hand there. "Hey Tris!" Uriah called. I saw him run up to me and smile. "Do you want to come to my house Friday?" Uriah and I hang out a lot so this was normal behavior. "Yeah, cool." I said. "Okay I gotta run, Tris." Uriah said. He waved me off and ran down the hall. Just then as I was walking to class, Four tripped me and I fell into a locker. I guess he meant what he said. I sighed and walked to class. Four was in this class, but luckily, so was Christina. Four sat in the back of the room with his feet kicked up on his desk. I sat down a row ahead of him, because that was the only row with two seats next to each other. Christina plopped down next to me and started working on an assignment. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him scribble something on a piece of paper, crumpled it into a small ball and threw it at me. It hit me in the back of the neck, and bounced off onto the ground. I picked up the ball and opened it.

_-Stiff_

_Meet me outside the classroom when class ends._

_-4 _

I turned my head and raised an eyebrow at him. He shrugged. I guess I would go anyway in case it was actually important but it could just be a death wish. Either way, after class I waited for Four. Peter saw me waiting there. Crap. "What're you waiting for, Stiff?" I rolled my eyes. "Do you want to get punched?" Sure enough I was thrown up against the wall and punched in the face. I felt a warm liquid trickle down my nose. Peter hit me again, harder and my vision began to turn black at the edges. One more punch. I fell unconscious. I was unconscious but I felt Peter hit my head against the wall. As I really began do drift away, I heard running footsteps, Peter's, becoming more distant with every step. I felt a set of arms, on my back and under my knees, pick me up. Then, I was too far gone.

**Four POV**

I was leaving class, when I saw Peter running. Not a good sign. I saw the Stiff, passed out against the wall. I picked her up and began walking towards the nurse. Wait- am I really helping the Stiff? I pushed through a lot of kids in the hall, avoiding strange looks. I pass Drew and Eric. "Aw, are you helpin your girlfwiend?" Eric asked in a baby voice. "Keep your mouth shut, Eric." I said and kept walking. "What are you gonna do?" Eric laughed. I sat the stiff against the wall, turned around and punched Eric in the face. Blood trickled from his nose and onto his lips. He brushed his fingertips over the bloody area, staining them. I think he was going to hit me back, but I walked away before he could do anything. I picked Tris up, and continued walking to the nurses' office. The nurse, Mrs. Phelps, was typing on her computer. I stood in the doorway waiting. She looked up from her computer and at me, and then Tris. "Lay her down." the nurse said. I put the Stiff on the cot. "What happened?" she asks looking down at her." "She fainted." I lied. The nurse examined her head a bit and then looked back at me. "Minor concussion. She'll be fine though." I nodded a little and turned to leave. "You can't leave." Mrs. Phelps said. "Huh? Why not?" I asked. "She can't wake up alone, she needs at least one familiar face to see." She explained. "What about her brother?" I asked. "He was dismissed early." She said. "Stay. I'll tell your teachers why you aren't in class." Great. I thought. This kid hates me and now I need to be the first thing she sees? This is all I need. I sat down in a chair next to the cot and waited. Around 45 minutes of waiting, and playing phone games, she woke up. Her eyes fluttered open and her gray-blue eyes spark with fear. Yay. But then it disappears. I know it's there. It has to be.

**Tris POV**

I wake up to bright lights that burn my eyes, above my head. I force my head to the side and see Four. He scared me a little because I'm used to him hurting me. The fear went away because I knew that's not why he was here. Wait- Four? "Good you're awake." He says. "What're you doing here?" I ask. "I-" he pauses. "I brought you here." I raised my eyebrow. "Nurse told me to stay because Caleb's away." I nodded. "Thanks for saving me." I said. "I didn't really save you, just prevented you from slipping into a coma." I smiled a little. "Well whatever you wanna call it, thanks." I say getting up. "Honey, you can go home if you want, I called your parents and told them what happened." I faked a smile. "Thanks." Great, now I'll be lectured about how I should have told them. Four leaned over to whisper to me. "I told her you fainted." He said. I smiled. For once, I actually appreciated him. "You can go too." The nurse said. "Make sure she doesn't faint again." We walked into the hall towards the door. "I guess you didn't really mean it then." He looked at me confused. "You saved my ass again." He smiled. Four? Smiling? I've only ever see him smirk. "I guess you're right." He said. "I must have overdosed on goodness this week, I guess." He said. He began to walk a different way than me when we opened the door. "Four?" I called. He turned on his heel and walked toward me. "Thanks, really." I say. "Yeah, never again, Stiff." He said laughing a bit. "Oh, shut up." I say and he leans in and kisses my forehead. I look at him for a second, a little shocked. Oh. My. God. FOUR just kissed me. Four! I looked down at my feet. He was still standing there. "Oh." He said. "Huh?" I ask finally looking up. "I kissed you." He says. "I thought you hated me?" I say confused. "I did too... I guess not..." He says a bit shyly, his face turning red. "Wait." He says snapping out of his shyness. "Why didn't you run off, or hit me, or something?" I shrug and say; "I don't hate you either, I guess." I was confused now. Do I like him? Was that just an act? "Let me walk you home." Now he'll probably stab me in an alley and leave me to die.

**Four POV**

I just kissed the Stiff. I like her I suppose, though I never could really come to my senses. What a great way to get a girl to like you, hurting her. I guess I need to tell her that I was stupid for doing that. We walked in silence until we got to her house. "Look, Stiff I'm sorry I-" she kissed my cheek and I stop talking. Huh? Argh. I'm confused. Too many emotions for me to take in. What's happening?! I frown to myself. she hated me this morning. I smiled at her a little when she pulled away. Ah shit, I smiled, now she probably thinks I'm in love with her or something. "Bye, Four." She says and walks in the house. I have some thinking to do.

**Tris POV**

I never thought I would kiss a number. WAIT! I kissed a number! FOUR! Oh god, I thought I hated him! "It was just a kiss, it won't happen again. Besides it wasn't even a lip kiss." I thought, "It meant nothing." How will Caleb take this...? 10 minutes later I find myself texting Christina. I need to tell my best friend first.

_T: Chris, we need to talk._

I waited about a minute and then Christina texted back.

_C: Sure Tris, what?_

_T: I kissed someone._

_C: AHHHH! My Trissy is growing up! WHO?!_

_T: I'd rather tell you in person _

_C: k be over in 10_

Sure enough, ten minutes later Christina was at my door. "WHO TRIS?!" She said walking in and hugging me. "You might want to sit down..." I said. "Tell me!" She whined. "Okay! Okay!" I said sitting beside her. "It was..." I paused. "Spit it out!" She snapped. I gulped. How would she take this? "Four."


	2. Out The Back Door

**A/N: hey! Okay, so here's a little synopsis of this chapter: Fourtris, Tris finds out that four is Tobias, and something big, but I won't tell you because I am a jerk, but mainly because I don't do spoilers. I won't waste anymore time, read on!**

**Tris POV**

"That's funny." She says. "C'mon tell me who it really is." She says. "Fine. I'll tell you in simple terms." She nods. "It's the number between three and five." I tell her. Her jaw drops open. "It was really him?!" She asks me stunned. "Yes! I don't know it was the moment! It wasn't even on the lips..." She pretended to throw up. "He kissed me on the forehead first!" I defended. She stopped fake puking. "Really?" "Yeah... I kissed his cheek though..." I scratched the back of my neck. "It was gross though, right?" I didn't respond. "Please tell me it was gross!" She says her tone getting louder. Again, I didn't answer. "You liked it!?" She yells in a girlyish way. "I never said I liked it!" I yell a little. "Oh, good, so you didn't like it?" "Well..." I didn't know how to finish that sentence. "UGH TRIS!" She says standing and putting her hands on her head in frustration and pulling her hair. "Please don't tell!" I begged. "I won't, I promise." She says sitting down again. I believe her. "So... Are you guys a thing?" She asks. "I don't know... Should we?" I ask completely blind to what I should do now. "All up to you, T." She says. I've never had a boyfriend. It could be interesting... No. I can't! But I should... Ugh, teenagers. "But you kissed him after everything he has done to you?" She asks. "Well... He has been nicer this week... And I don't know what to do!" I say. "Shit..." Christina says looking at her phone. "I'd love to help you Tris, but I've gotta run, called into work... Bye, I will text you later!" She says, and with that she leaves. And I'm alone. Again. My parents come in the house around 5:30, I've been home around four hours now, doing nothing, but pacing in my room. I fell, back first onto my bed and sighed. I checked my phone. I had a message from a number I had never seen.

_Hey_

I replied;

_Hi... Who is this? _

About a minute later I got this text;

_4._

Four. Yay. I guess I like him a little but I don't love him. Okay, so I like him a lot somehow, but it's just awkward. I changed the contact from the phone number to just 'Four'.

_T:_ _Oh. Hi four. Where'd u get my number._

_4: Zeke _

_T: how'd he know?_

_4: Uriah has it taped in his room, so he doesn't forget it. Zeke and him share a room_

_T: Oh._

_4: sorry only Zeke knows where it is besides Uriah, and I kind of told Zeke about... you know... and he said I should text you_

_T: that's ok I told Christina _

_4: ok good. _

_T: sorry about today _

_4: It's not your fault, sorry for being an asshole for four years_

_T: thanks_

_4: Christina got my number somewhere and keeps saying "OMG! Are you guys a thing?" _

_T: haha_

_4: I wish it were funny, she texted me that literally 47 times!_

_T: lol, the copy and paste method, love it._

_4: what should I tell her? Or should I just change my number?_

_T: haha well if changing your number means your name and you are changing it to Five, I'm out _

_4: haha_

_T: no but I guess you could tell her that I'll tell her, I mean we need to actually talk about this_

_4: I guess ur right _

_T: can I ask you something? _

_4: sure_

_T: do you_ like me? _Or was it just in_ _the heat of the moment?_

Four didn't respond for about two minutes, and I figured I scared him off. But then I heard my phone buzz.

**Incoming Call**

Four

Slide to answer

I picked up the phone. "Hello?" I started. "Hi... Sorry for not responding, can we talk in person?" He says. I wondered if he did like me. "Ok... Where?" I say. "Um... Starbucks? I guess..." He says. "Alright, I'll be there in ten minutes." I say slowly, softly. There is a short silence. "Okay." I hear him end the call. I walked downstairs. "Bye mom, bye dad! Going to Starbucks with a friend!" I had almost reached the door when they interrupt me. "What friend?" They ask accusingly. "Christina." I say confidently and walk out the door. I quickly dialed Christina's number. "Hello?" I hear her say. "Hey back me up!" I began. "If anybody asks I'm at Starbucks with you!" "Ok fine Tris, what's the big deal, its just Starbucks?" She says confused. "I told my parents I was going with you!" I explain. "And?" She sounds still confused. "And I'm going with Four!" I heard a tiny gasp at the other end of the line and I could picture her mouth dropped open and wide eyes. "Oh my god Tris!" "We needed to talk." I say. "About what?" She says like an excited thirteen year old. "I'll tell you later, bye." With that I ended the call. I got in my car and drove towards Starbucks. Right on the street that goes into the parking lot, Four called. I answered it and it was hooked up to a hands-free device so I didn't need to hold my phone, and I could hear him through the car. "Hey, I'm here okay, just so you know." He says. "Alright I'm pulling in right now." I pulled in, ended the call, got out of my car and walked into Starbucks. I see Four sitting at a table in the corner, playing games on his phone. He looked up and saw me and waved a little. It's so weird that someone I used to hate can act this nice. I sat down and smiled a little. "Hi." I say. "Hey. Anyway, to answer your question..." He says motioning to his phone. "Yes. Do you?" I paused, internally smiling. "Yes. Yes I do." I say letting the smile break through. "Now to answer Christina's question?" We laughed a bit. "Are we a thing?" He asks me. "Do you want to be a thing?" He smiles. "If that's what you want." "Well... Then yes. We are." I kissed his cheek, everything was still awkward, but a little less now that we're dating. "Should we keep it a secret?" I ask. "I mean you would get shit from your friends." I say. "What friends? Peter, Eric, and Drew?" I nodded. "I never really liked them, I was confused and in desperate need of friends. My only real friend is Zeke. I may be popular, but I have a lack of real friends and never had a girlfriend until now, so pretty much, I'm a loser." He said holding an 'L' to his forehead. "I don't think so, and neither does the rest of the school, but if you want to make it public, you can." I said. "I'd be happy to be seen with you, Tris." He says. "I think we should keep it private for about a week or so, obviously with the exception of Christina and Zeke, but we should figure out a cute way to tell our friends." I suggested. "I like that." He said smiling. I called Christina to come get my car and drive it to her house. At first, she was pissed because she needed to walk there, but she finally said yes. She went in, got a coffee and took my car. I got in Four's car and we drove to the park to take a walk. "So if we are going to be dating now..." Four started. "There are a few things you should know about me." He says. Great. He's probably an ax murderer. "Okay." I say. "What is it?" "Well, can I ask you a couple things? Then you can ask me something." I nod. "Who was your first friend?" He asks. "Well, when I was 9, I was really close with this kid, Tobias Eaton. He moved when I was 11. He goes to our school, I think, but I just never see him, not that I would recognize him anyway." I explain. "Okay cool." He says, holding my hand in his. "What is your favorite color?" "Black." He replies. "Okay, so back to those things you should know about me." He started. "Let's start out with my name." I was anxious to learn Four's name. "You're the only person who knows this, okay?" I nod. "I'm... Tobias Eaton." He says. "Seriously? Or are you just saying that because I said that name earlier?" I ask in disbelief. "Really, I am! I can prove it right now." He said. "Look at me." He said. We stopped walking and I looked at his face. He had those dark blue eyes that I missed so much. "Oh, and here!" He pointed to a scar above his eyebrow. "This is from when you hit me with a frisbee when we were ten!" He said. "Oh yeah... Didn't you have to get stitches?" He nodded. "Tobias..." I said. "Wait, so why is your name Four?" I ask curiously. "Ah, I was getting to that." He says. "Four fears, four then, four now." He says, and I nod. "Not to ruin the moment, but why didn't you tell me who you were? Why did you bully me?" I ask. He is silent for a moment. "I couldn't see your reaction. I was afraid you wouldn't care and you would just- I don't know, hate me for leaving you." I don't know why I would hate my first best friend, but I don't say anything, just let him continue. "I bullied you because... God, I don't even know, Tris. Maybe I just took it out on you because of my dad..." Tobias told me once that his mother was dead and that his father beats him senseless. It's strange to think that I was able to hate my first best friend. I'm glad I have my Tobias back.

**Tobias POV **

"So... About your fears... How do you know there is only four?" Tris says. "Surely you've heard of E.R.U.D.I.T.E. , right?" I ask. Erudite was a company that had some of the best scientists in the world. The company worked closely alongside the government and was very well known in Chicago, where we live. In fact, the main branch of Erudite, Erudite headquarters, was just across from Millennium Park. "Yes, who hasn't?" She says. "I don't know. Anyways, my 'father' Marcus," I say using air quotes around the word father. "He works closely with the Erudite, because he works in a high branch of government." She nods. "The Erudite have developed a serum that simulates your fears. I've been through my fear landscape several times." She raises an eyebrow at me. "How did you get in?" She asks curiously. "Easy. I tell them I am Marcus Eaton's son." I basically had to cough out the word 'son'. If I was his son, I wouldn't have scars on my damn back from his beatings. "They just let you in?!" She asks in amazement. "Actually no... That's not true... They don't give a fuck who you are... I actually have to wear a blue shirt, and I jacked a couple badges off a few scientists like, six months ago." She laughed and lightly hit my arm. "Do you want to see?"

**Tris POV**

Of course I wanted to see! That's incredible! "Yeah, but I'm not wearing blue..." I say in disappointment. "I have an extra in my car." He says.

Sure enough, he has two blue shirts in his car. He took his shirt off, and grabbed the blue one. All I could do was stare, he got hot. Damn, Tobias. Luckily, he didn't notice. I sat in the car with the shirt in my hands. He was standing outside and he poked his head through the open door. "Are you gonna put it on?" I nodded. "Turn around." He sighs and turns away from the car. I quickly take my shirt off and slip the long sleeved blue one on. It's big on me, obviously. One side hangs off my shoulder, which is cute. I took the elastic from my hair and tied the bottom of the shirt so it was shorter. I slip the blue lanyard with the work badge over my head. "Can I turn around now?" "Yeah." I decided to call Christina to ask for more backup. "Yo, Christina." I say when she answers. "Tris! Hi!" She says way too excitedly for a phone call. "Yeah, hi... I need more backup... I'm going to be with you until 12:30 okay? If my parents call and want to talk to me, tell them I'm in the bathroom and you will have me home by twelve thirty." It was only 10:34 right now, so we could have some time at Erudite. "Ooh, you and Four..." She says. "Urgh shut up!" I said hanging up. Tobias turned his head and looked at me with confusion. "Not you, Christina." He nodded and turned to the wheel. Erudite was a forty five minute drive from where we were, usually it would be ten, but we stopped for gas, and I got hungry so we got fast food and ate there. I like Tobias's music selection. He must like Eminem because he has a playlist of lots of his songs. (A/N: I really like EMINEM and this playlist actually exsists on my phone.)

The order goes:

1\. When I'm Gone

2\. Like Toy Soldiers

3\. The Monster

4\. Berzerk

5\. Not Afraid

6\. Love the Way you Lie

7\. Lose Yourself

I like all of these songs. The exact time 'Lose yourself'' ends, we pulled into the parking lot of Erudite headquarters. We walk to the main entrance and Tobias scans the badge and I scan mine. It was already 11:16. "It's later at night," Tobias started in a whisper. "So that means that there aren't many scientists around..." He takes me to a room that clearly says in bold lettering 'FEAR LANDSCAPES' on the door. He scans the card again and the door clicks open. There are signs everywhere that say;

**E.R.U.D.I.T.E.**

**Enhancing **

**Reality and**

**Upgrading**

**Different**

**Intellectual**

**Topics**

**Everyday**

Of course, there is one in the room. Tobias locks the door and takes a little black box from the corner. They have two huge syringes with a brownish orange colored liquid in them. He hands me one. The needle is intimidating, but I don't care. "Here." Tobias says taking the needle. He brushes hair away from my neck. He is gentle with the needle. He puts it in my neck and presses the plunger. He hands me his. "Right here." he says tapping the spot on his neck. "I've never done this before." I say. "It's okay." I sink the needle in his neck, cringing as I do so, and press the plunger. The room disintegrates and a strong wind hits us. I grip Tobias to steady myself. It's a strange thought to think that it's him I'm holding onto. I look around. We stand on top of the Sears Tower, the tallest building in Chicago. "Heights?" I ask. He nods, closes his eyes, and takes a deep breath. He takes my hand- my free hand that isn't holding oto his shoulder for dear life. He begins to walk forward and I follow. His walk turns to a jog, and then he breaks into a sprint. We reach the edge of the building and jump. Our hands are still tangled together as we fall. I attempt to pull him closer to me by wrapping my arm around his waist. When we hit the ground, it didn't feel like we just jumped off a building, it was more like a swing set. "Next is-" he begins but is cut off by something hitting him and I from behind. "Confinement." I hear his breathing speed up. My face heats up because of how close I am to him. Thank god it's dark. I shrink down and my head is against his chest. This is the closest we've been. I can hear his heartbeat. He groans. Not at me, but the box. "Hey," I say. "It's okay. Here-" I guide his arms around my body so he has more space. He clutches at my back and puts his face next to mine, still hunched over. His body is warm, but I feel only his bones and the muscle that wraps around them. My cheeks get hot. Can he tell I'm still built like a child? "This is worse, this is definitely-" I cut him off. "Shh, arms around me." I say. I guide his hand over my heart. "Feel how steady it is?" I ask. "It's fast." He says. "Yes, well that has nothing to do with the box." I wonder if he knows I just told him something. "Maybe talking will help... Where did this fear come from?" I ask. "My fantastic childhood- childhood punishments. The tiny closet upstairs- my mother kept our winter coats in the closet... I don't want to talk about this anymore, Tris." He says. "Okay, well I can talk... What do you want to know?" I ask. "Why is your heart racing?" Lie! Lie now! "Well, I barely know you. I barely know you and I'm crammed up against you in a box- what do you think, Four?" He laughs shakily in my ear. The box's walls fall away, as if his laugh broke it. "You are a terrible liar." He shakes his head at me and then his smile falls. He walks over to a table where a bullet and a gun appear. A woman stands across from us. He sighs and loads the bullet in the gun. "This fear is different than the others, more nervous panic than blind terror." He looks away and fires the gun. We walk away from the girl and a dark figure appears. "Your last fear..." He gulps. "I- Is your worst fear.." The dark figure comes into the little light we have and reveals Marcus Eaton, the governor. He holds a belt. The Marcuses multiply. "This is for your own good." He raises the belt and Tobias flinches. Just as he swings the belt forward, I jump in front of Tobias. The belt stings as it wraps around my wrist, but I take advantage of it. When it wraps around my wrist, I grab it and yank it out of his hand. I swing back the belt and it hits him. Tobias is more alert now and ready to punch him. The room disappears and we sit in the landscape room again. He is breathing heavily. "You okay?" He asks. "I should be asking you that." I say. He nods. "I'm fine." He says, shaking a bit. "Hey, we got through it." I say touching his shoulder. "You got me through it." "Come on," he says. "I have something else to show you." I get up and follow him. There is a door that says 'THE DAUNTLESS ROOM' in bold. Under it is a piece of paper that says 'under construction'. "They're building this for some reason. Something big is going to happen Tris, but I don't know what." He says. "Lets go." He scans his card and we walk through the door. The door leads outside. "Hang on." I tell him. I dial my home phone number. "Hi... Mom?" She replies; "Hi, are you coming home?" I smirk at my idea. "I'm sleeping over Chrissy's, okay?" I hope this works. "Oh honey, it's a school night." She says. Lie! "We have a project due and we need to work on it all night!" I say. There is a short silence. "Okay, but what about clothes? Do you want me to bring you some?" Lie. Lie. Lie. "No, we went shopping today." I smile. It's working. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow, love you!" With that, she hangs up the phone. I call Christina. "Hey, I'm sleeping over later, don't ask questions, bye!" I say before she can respond. "Anyway, what are we doing?" I ask Tobias. We are on a roof. "See that ledge? We need to jump." He sighs. "What?" I ask. "Don't think, just jump. I've been here before." I stand on the ledge. Is this one of his sick tricks? Is the old Four back? No, the old Four would never let me inside his head. "You promise it's okay?" He nods. I look down. There is a large hole at the bottom. "Here, I'll go first." I step down and he steps up. He bends his knees and jumps. It makes me cringe. I wait about a minute after he jumps before stepping back up. I close my eyes, take a deep breath and jump. I like the rush the falling gives me. I hit something hard. It gives way beneath me and cradles my body. The impact knocks the wind out of me and I wheeze, struggling to breathe again. My arms and legs sting. A net. There is a net at the bottom of the hole. I look up at the building and laugh, half relieved and half hysterical. My body shakes and I cover my face with my hands. I just jumped off a roof. I have to stand on solid ground again. I see a hand- Tobias's- stretching out to me at the edge of the net, so I grab it and pull myself across. I roll off, and I would have fallen face-first onto a wood floor if he hadn't caught me. His hands grip my arms, but he releases me a moment after I stand upright again. "Thank you," I say. We stand on a platform ten feet above the ground. Around us is an open cavern. Four sets his hand on my back and says, "Welcome to Dauntless."

**A/N: so... I hope you liked this! Long chapter! Fourtris already and even some Dauntless in there! I added a few book moments, so you tell me should I keep adding them every now and then? Or just don't add them? Oh, So the song ocean avenue, I decided to put as her alarm because it reminds me a lot of Fourtris throughout the series. You should check it out, it's Ocean Avenue by Yellowcard, like I said. Next chapter you find out what 'You reflect me' means. Is that a good title? I will answer any questions if you ask! I promise to update as soon as possible! Oh, and if you have any ideas, or things that you want to see them say or do, review or PM them to me and I will check them out and possibly put them in! Okay, I won't waste any more of your time, so, Review your thoughts! Bye!**

**~B**


	3. Where I Used To Sit and Talk With You

**Tris POV**

"Oh my god, Tobias!" I say. "This place is amazing!" He smiles. "Follow me." I follow him into a large, completely stone room with the sounds of running water in it. "Be careful in here, the chasm has no railing." I look over, and sure enough there is a river with rocks at the bottom, but nothing protecting you from falling. "This is the Pit." He says. "The name suits it." I say. "Yep. It's nice here though, in Dauntless." He says. "This is the only place finished, the rest is under construction. Erudite isn't even sure if they are releasing this to the public." I raise my eyebrows. "Really? That's kind of a waste of time and money." I say. "See, this is a beta. I heard talk around here that they might make it a building." He says. "Wow." I say in amazement. "You know, I could really get used to it here." I say. "It's just incredible." He smiles. "Yeah. I could too..." He looks around the huge room with a certain softness to his hard expression, a special spark in those deep blue eyes. The first time I met him, I thought they were black.

**FLASHBACK, first time they meet.**

**Beatrice, age 9**

I walk outside my house, in search of something to do. Usually, at times like this I would lay on the ground and stare at the clouds and try and make shapes. Today, that seemed like the obvious thing to do, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Instead, I decide to take a walk down the road. Most of these houses are the same; gray and cookie cutter. Some are sort of a light tan, or a cream color, but that's about it. My house was a deep gray. It would be considered pretty, I think, had it not been surrounded by the same things. I turn the corner on my block. I glance at some of the houses every now and then. One house has a big tree in the front yard. There is a boy wearing all gray sitting on a thick branch, very close to the top. He swings his legs back and forth, almost giving me a heart attack each time he does it. "Hey!" I yell up to him. He looks around my age, maybe a bit older. He waves. "Hi." I wonder why I have never seen the boy. "You comin'?" He asks. "Where?" I ask confused. "Up here, c'mon it'll be fun." I nod and smile a little. I see no cars in the driveway, therefore unable to be reprimanded for trespassing. My parents aren't home either. I put my foot on a part of the tree that sticks out and start to climb. Once I am near thicker branches, enough to support my weight, I climb them. "Here." The boy extends his hand to me. I take his hand and he helps me onto the branch. "It's nice up here." He says. I nod. There is a silence between us, not an awkward silence, but a peaceful one. This, I feel, is a special moment, one that I need to treasure. (A/N: this is Tris's first 'moment') "You'll never believe this," the boy starts. "but I'm afraid of heights." I stare down at the ground, around 30 feet below us, and giggle. "When did you figure this out?" I say smiling. "About an hour ago. I got myself up here, really don't know how I'll get down." He smirks. "We can do it together. Okay?" I say. "Okay, but not just yet." He closes his eyes for a minute. When he opens them, he looks at me and smiles. "I'm Tobias, by the way." He says. I stare into his eyes. They look black. "Beatrice." He smiles. "Alright then, Beatrice," he starts, smiling again. "Tell me about yourself." I return his smile and nod a little. "My name is Beatrice Prior, I am 9, I have an older brother named Caleb who is also 9-" he interrupts. "Wait, how is he older but you are the same age?" He asks, confused. "We were born in different years, just I was born before he turned one." He nods in understanding. "Proceed." I continue. "I love strawberries, especially chocolate covered ones, they are sooo good!" I smile a lot. "How about you?" "My name is Tobias Eaton, I am also 9 but 10 next week, I have no siblings, I love cherries, and my favorite color is black or green. What's your favorite color?" I think for a moment. "Blue." I say. "What kind, like my eyes? Or the sky?" I stare at him. "Your eyes are blue?" That may have come off a bit rude. "Yeah, it's just really dark." I look in his eyes. When he smiles, you can see the blue a bit better, like it changes with his mood. It's electrifying. "Yeah, like your eyes." We talk for a little longer before he finally decides he's scared and wants to get down. I climb down a little and he follows. "Okay, good so far!" I tell him. Once I get to around five feet off the ground, I jump and stumble a bit before regaining my balance. "Okay, c'mon Tobias." He hops down, like I did. "I have an idea! Wait here." About five minutes later, he comes back with two beach towels, two plastic bags with strawberries and cherries in them, and a small trunk. He sets the beach towels down and we sit on them. He hands me a bag of fruit. I take it and begin eating a strawberry. "If I show you this," he pauses to pop a cherry in his mouth. "You promise not to tell anybody?" He holds up his pinky and I link mine with his. "Promise." He unlatches the trunk and opens the lid. Inside is a beautiful blue glass sculpture that looks like water. "Why is this so secret?" I ask quietly, admiring the sculpture. I touch my fingertips to its smooth surface. He hesitates, before saying, "I can't tell you yet. But I will. One day." I don't get annoyed. I know he probably has a good reason for keeping it from me. I hand the sculpture back to him. I lay back against the towel and look at the sky. He does the same. "I like to look up and try to see what shapes I can find." He points a finger out. "I see a bottle." I look in the direction he's pointing in. "It looks like a dysfunctional butterfly to me." He laughs. "That one looks like a flame!" I say. "Yeah. Hey, that one look like a bunny." We picked out shapes for another 20 minutes or so. "I should go home." I tell him. "Okay, it was nice meeting you!" I smile at him. "You too." He turns to walk in but I stop him. "Oh, and Tobias?" He looks over his shoulder. "We should do this again." It was a bit awkward saying it, but it was worth it. "Okay." He walks toward me. "I'm just down the street if you need a friend." With that, he smiles and walks in the house.

**Tris, age 17 (present day)**

Dauntless is great, but it's getting late. "Hey Tobias," I say. He looks up at me, placing his hands on the edge of the chasm to steady himself, our legs over the edge. Mine are the same way. We had been here for half an hour, just talking. It wasn't safe but whatever. "It's getting late, do you wanna go?" He nods and carefully pulls his legs away from the edge. Once we're outside, an idea pops into my mind. "Tobias, what if we don't tell Chris and Zeke? That way we can make it all special!" He nods. "Whatever works best," another idea. I gasp exaggeratedly. "Homecoming!" I say gripping the blue fabric on his shoulder. "What about it?" He asks. "It's in a week! So if we're going together, I'll go to your game and then we go to the dance and that's how they find out!" Four is the quarterback on our football team. He's really good. Ironically, his jersey number is 04. Above it, it says Eaton, but nobody pays attention to that. "Sorry Tris, I already have a date." He says. That hurt. I'm about to say something when he goes, "I'm kidding! There are too many slu- girls, oh who am I kidding? Sluts, that throw themselves at me. It's annoying!" I giggle a bit. We walk to his car and he pushes the start button in his car. (A/N: yeah, yeah, it's one of those cars.) He takes the auxiliary cable and plugs it into his phone. I hear the first chords of what just may be one of my favorite songs. He starts to softly sing along to it. "There's a place off ocean avenue..." He starts. I scream, causing him to slam on the breaks. "Oh shit, Tris! You scared the hell out of me!" I blush a bit. "Sorry, I've just never really met someone who knows this song." He looks confused. "You like this?" I nod. "I love this! It's my alarm!" We roll the windows down and start singing loudly to it. (A/N: the reason I put the song ocean avenue in this is because if you listen to the words, i think it relates to the book a lot! Check it out.) When the song is over the next song comes on. I raise my eyebrow at Four. "Really? Me and my broken heart?" I laugh a little. "Yeah, so?" I smile. "You are such a dork." He starts singing along to it and I start hysterically laughing. I take a snapchat video and send it to Christina. You can hear me dying in the background. Then Mirrors by Justin Timberlake comes on. "Pull over." I say. "Why?" He does so anyway. "I love this song." So we sit in the car and listen.

**(A/N: PLEASE READ, or don't I don't really care.) **

_Aren't you somethin' to admire?_

_'Cause your shine is somethin' like a mirror_

_And I can't help but notice_

_You reflect in this heart of mine_

_If you ever feel alone and_

_The glare makes me hard to find_

_Just know that I'm always_

_Parallel on the other side_

_'Cause with your hand in my hand and a pocket full of soul_

_I can tell you there's no place we couldn't go_

_Just put your hand on the glass_

_I'll be tryin' to pull you through_

_You just gotta be strong_

_'Cause I don't wanna lose you now_

_I'm lookin' right at the other half of me_

_The vacancy that sat in my heart_

_Is a space that now you hold_

_Show me how to fight for now_

_And I'll tell you, baby, it was easy_

_Comin' back here to you once I figured it out_

_You were right here all along_

_It's like you're my mirror_

_My mirror staring back at me_

_I couldn't get any bigger_

_With anyone else beside of me_

_And now it's clear as this promise_

_That we're making two reflections into one_

_'Cause it's like you're my mirror_

_My mirror staring back at me, staring back at me_

_Aren't you somethin', an original_

_'Cause it doesn't seem merely a sample_

_And I can't help but stare, 'cause_

_I see truth somewhere in your eyes_

_I can't ever change without you_

_You reflect me, I love that about you_

_And if I could, I would look at us all the time_

_'Cause with your hand in my hand and a pocket full of soul_

_I can tell you there's no place we couldn't go_

_Just put your hand on the glass_

_I'll be tryin' to pull you through_

_You just gotta be strong_

_'Cause I don't wanna lose you now_

_I'm lookin' right at the other half of me_

_The vacancy that sat in my heart_

_Is a space that now you hold_

_Show me how to fight for now_

_And I'll tell you, baby, it was easy_

_Comin' back here to you once I figured it out_

_You were right here all along_

_It's like you're my mirror_

_My mirror staring back at me_

_I couldn't get any bigger_

_With anyone else beside of me_

_And now it's clear as this promise_

_That we're making two reflections into one_

_'Cause it's like you're my mirror_

_My mirror staring back at me, staring back at me_

_Yesterday is history_

_Tomorrow's a mystery_

_I can see you lookin' back at me_

_Keep your eyes on me_

_Baby, keep your eyes on me_

_'Cause I don't wanna lose you now_

_I'm lookin' right at the other half of me_

_The vacancy that sat in my heart_

_Is a space that now you hold_

_Show me how to fight for now (please show me, baby)_

_I'll tell you, baby, it was easy_

_Comin' back here to you once I figured it out_

_You were right here all along_

_It's like you're my mirror_

_My mirror staring back at me_

_I couldn't get any bigger_

_With anyone else beside of me_

_And now it's clear as this promise_

_That we're making two reflections into one_

_'Cause it's like you're my mirror_

_My mirror staring back at me, staring back at me_

_You are, you are the love of my life [x10]_

_Now you're the inspiration for this precious song_

_And I just wanna see your face light up since you put me on_

_So now I say goodbye to the old me, it's already gone_

_And I can't wait wait wait wait wait to get you home_

_Just to let you know, you are_

_You are, you are the love of my life [x8]_

_Girl you're my reflection, all I see is you_

_My reflection, in everything I do_

_You're my reflection and all I see is you_

_My reflection, in everything I do_

_You are, you are the love of my life [x16]_

He slowly leans towards me and I do the same. Wait, what? Who cares? I'm feeling daring today. "You reflect me," he starts. "I love that about you." When his face was only about an inch away from mine, the next song came on and scared the shit out of me, causing me to jerk away. Thanks a lot Boom Clap. "Sorry." I say. He pauses the song. "No, keep it on." I tell him. He restarts the song.

_Boom Boom Boom Clap_

_You're picture perfect blue_

_Sunbathing under moon_

_Stars shining as your bones illuminate_

_First kiss just like a drug_

_Under your influence_

_You take me over you're the magic in my veins_

He continues to lean in and so do I.

_This must be love_

His lips touch mine just as the chorus starts.

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

_No silver or no gold_

_Could dress me up so good_

_You're the glitter in the darkness of my world_

_Just tell me what to do_

_I'll fall right into you_

_Going under cast a spell just say the word_

_I feel your love_

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

_You are the light and I will follow_

_You let me lose my shadow_

_You are the sun the glowing halo_

_And you keep burning me up with all of your love_

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

_Boom Clap_

_The sound of my heart_

_The beat goes on and on and on and on and_

_Boom Clap_

_You make me feel good_

_Come on to me come on to me now_

We kiss for the entire song, but stopping to breathe every so often. I smile at him. That kiss set off fireworks in my head. We were still pulled over and on an unknown back road. I had an idea. "Tobias, come here." I get out of the car and so does he. I climb onto the hood and lay on the windshield. He does the same. I take his hand in mine. We stare up at the stars. "It's so beautiful at night," I say. He nods. "Yeah, it is." We sit there for a long time in a comfortable silence until it starts to rain a little. We go back into the car and he drives to Christina's. I really didn't want to leave him, but Christina is already going to bombard me with questions. Once we arrive at Christina's, I step out of the car and it's now a fucking torrential downpour. I had already put my shirt back on, but it was soaked now, like the rest of me. Four hands me his hoodie. Aw. I take the sweatshirt and pull it over my head. It's baggy, but not that bad. My hair is soaked and the hood prevents it from getting worse. Of course, he's drenched now. "Four," I start. He looks up. "Kiss me." "What?" I smile. "Kiss me, I want this to be a cliché but memorable moment!" He kisses me quickly. "Really?" I ask. "That's it?" He nods toward the house. "Who cares?" He lifts me and spins me before bringing my face down to his. He kisses me passionately for like 30 seconds. I hug him tightly. he smells like soap, wind, and sweat, and rainwater. It's kind of nice. "Okay, since Chris probably saw all of that, we can tell her and Zeke." He nods and kisses my cheek. "Night, Tris!" He says. "Night Four, thanks for everything!" He nods and gets into his car. I walk up to Chris's front door. There is a note taped to it.

_-Tris_

_Parents and Rose are asleep, just walk in... QUIETLY!_

_Luv ya_

_-Chris_

I open the door and walk inside... Quietly. She's sitting on the couch, channel surfing. "Where have you been?" She asks like a mom. "Don't play dumb, I know you saw that whole thing." I say. "I got some awesome pictures, wanna see?" I roll my eyes. "Fine." She whips out her phone and shows me the pictures. They were cute. She took six. The first is me and him standing together. The second he's giving me the hoodie, the third is his first kiss, the quick one, The fourth is him holding me in the air, the fifth is our second kiss, and the last one is of me hugging him. "Stalker." I say. She pushes me lightly. There's a towel on the couch. I look at her with confusion. "Sit on it. I knew you would be drenched." I sit down. "So what'd you even do tonight?" Here come the questions. "We went to Starbucks, and took a walk, you know that, after that, we drove around, mirrors came on and we pulled over. I was about to kiss him but I didn't because Boom Clap scared the shit out of me but then I kissed him anyway because, you know, fuck logic, and then we laid on his car and looked at the stars but then it started raining and here I am." I take in a deep breath because I said all of that without breathing. I leave out the part about Erudite. "Woah, Tris." She says seriously. "What?" I ask. She perks up and squeals, "You have a boyfriend!"

**A/N: sorry I didn't update for kinda awhile, it took long to write. Anyway, I hope you liked this! I had their first kiss planned out for kind of a long time. I think I'll add more flashbacks like where they first met, so you get a glimpse of what it was like before Four was Four, and when Tris was just Beatrice. Review!**

***B


	4. If You Wanna Start A Fight

**A/N: I'm so sorry for not updating in forever like honestly, I feel like a bitch. Sorry if the beginning of this chapter is kinda shitty... When I started writing it was at 2:20 am, It will get better. I'm really sorry, I won't be updating a lot now. School started. I will try so hard to update once a day, or at least once a week. :( Seriously though I'm especially sorry that I took sooo long to update.**

**Tris POV**

"Yeah, yeah," I tell her. "So do you, what's going on with you and Mr. William?" I ask. "Will's good. We're good." I yawn. "Chris, I'm tired, can we go to bed?" I ask. "Sure, who wouldn't be tired after what you two did." She says wiggling her eyebrows. I punch her. "Ow!" She says rubbing her shoulder. "That's what you get!" I say. She pulls out the sofa bed. "You didn't deny it!" She curls up before I can say anything. "Night!" I disregard her previous comment. "Night."

**Wednesday**

"TRIS!" Christina shakes me. "Wake up!" I groan. "What?" She grabs my wrists and yanks me up. "It's 6:15! Your goddamn alarm has been going off for 15 minutes! It's driving me insane! Get ready!" Christina lets me borrow one of her smallest outfits. It's kind of cute. It is a dark gray T-shirt with a v-neck and some jeans. She says its her smallest and plainest outfit. We have a really fast breakfast- an Eggo waffle and bacon- and I brush my teeth with the toothbrush I keep here. I'm always here so I just left one here. "Come on Tris!" She drags me towards the door. I grab my phone off the table and we run outside. Despite the fact that it was pretty cold now, Christina opens up the roof of her convertible and plugs in her phone. She starts blasting Donald Trump by Mac Miller. Christina and I start singing it word for word. We reach the school, and she closes the roof. I see Caleb and wave at him briefly. I really want to avoid Tobias today, because I know he won't hurt me like he used to. I am trying to avoid him being the talk of the school. I'll tell him later so he doesn't think I am doing it purposely. I know he said he didn't mind it, but I feel like I should, to save his popular reputation. I hope that since I'm his girlfriend now, maybe he won't be seen as a jerk. In the hallway, my phone vibrates in my pocket. It's just a Twitter notification from Lauren. God I hate her.

__lalalauren_ said: Its official. Four is my homecoming date and bf!_

Underneath that she tagged Four. I want to throw up. Just last night, he was kissing me and apologizing for being a jerk, and now he's dating another girl?! He told me his real name for Gods sake! I run out of the school on the edge of tears. I run to the opposite side of the school, and lean against the brick wall and bury my face in my knees. The tears spill over. I knew it was too good to be true. I hear a car pull up, and then the car door open, then shut. "Hey, Tris," Tobias says. I look up and see him smiling sweetly. His smile falters when he sees that I'm crying. He drops his backpack next to his car and starts walking towards me. I try to make a move to get up and run, the scenario all planned out in my head, but then he stops in front of me and I can't leave. He crouches to my level and says, "What happened?" I sob. He tries to hug me but I push him away. "Get away from me. You know what happened!" He looks confused. The look is convincing. It doesn't convince me. "No? Why don't you go talk to your girlfriend about it?" I yell angrily. "Girlfriend? Tris, what-" I cut him off. "Don't play stupid, Four!" I push past him and walk away. His phone vibrates. He looks at it and cradles his face in his hands. "It's not true!" He says before slumping against the wall. I think he is crying but I can't tell. It isn't like Lauren knew we were going out, so obviously it has to be true. I hear footsteps behind me. "Just get away!" I sob. "What did I do?" Christina says. Oh no. "You were going to be late, so I thought-" I cut her off and hug her, sobbing harshly into her shoulder. Her phone buzzes and I sob again. She looks at it. I can't believe my best friend, and boyfriend would do that to me. "I think we should go," she says. "Like, ditch?" I ask. "I guess..." she says. I sniff. "No, we can't," I say. "Okay, well then... Let's go. We still have exactly..." she looks at her phone. "Ninety seconds to get into that building!" We book it to inside. When homeroom as over, we have art. I am dreading art, so when Christina left for science, after I reassured her that I'd be fine, I run to the girl's bathroom and cry until art is over. I am pathetic. I look in the mirror to see if it looks like I had been crying. It does, so I throw water all over my face until the redness fades a little. I need Caleb right now, but Caleb can't know that I had a boyfriend and then they hurt me. Caleb hates him anyway. I go to my locker for math. Christina is in this class too. When I open the locker, a folded piece of paper falls out. I know it's from Four. I open it anyway. It says in really nice, big, bold cursive at the top;

_I'm Candor_

and then in small print,

_(look it up)_

There is a drawing of us sitting on the car, which is incredible considering he had no resource. Four is really talented at art. As much as I wanted to burn the picture, I couldn't do it. Maybe he was Candor... whatever that means. I pull out my phone and look it up.

can·dor

ˈkandər/

_noun_

the quality of being open and honest in expression; frankness.

"a man of refreshing candor"

Ah, yes, maybe he is. I doubt it though. I stick the picture in the deepest depths of my locker, where only I will find it. I still can't bear to see his face, but I can't miss two more classes. Math was hard. He isn't even in this class, but the number four was said several times. History was killing me, he was in this too, and so did music. The rest of the day was somewhat easier than the classes he was in. At lunch, I sat alone with Christina, earning us confused glances from the gang. Everything is the way it was two days ago. Except now, I'm sad and sitting alone. When school ended, I walk home with Caleb, trying to stay strong. I am successful and once we reach the door, I go straight upstairs.

**Four POV**

Why won't she just believe me? Lauren likes me and somehow found out about us. Tris and Lauren are like sworn enemies, so she started a rumor to turn her against me. I hope she forgives me soon enough, I don't think I can last. This sucks. Lauren sucks. My life sucks. I need to fix this, before I lose her for good. I have been sitting on the couch for about an hour now, watching a South Park marathon on Comedy Central. I decide I need to get off my lazy, depressed, ass and do something with my life. I walk outside, without a sweatshirt, and instantly regret it. The cold stings, but I don't care. I run and I don't know where I'm going. My sadness is replaced with anger. I won't lose her. I won't. I'll make sure of it. I will fight for her, even if she doesn't want me back, I need to know she believes me.

**Tris POV**

I lay on my bed. I have been here for the past like five hours watching a show on Netflix. I really am pathetic. Here I am, 17 years old. The last thing I expected I would be doing, is laying on my bed, eating cookie dough ice cream from the tub, and finishing a season and a half of Futurama. I love Futurama **(A/N: I really do!)**, and watching five hours worth, took my mind off of Four for a while. It may have even killed a couple brain cells. At least I'm not focusing on a guy anymore, no, I'm focusing on an alcoholic robot named Bender. What have I done to myself? Who cares, I think most teenage girls go through this, it's just my turn now. You know, if Four doesn't want me, then he can- he can- uh... BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS. Yeah, that's it. Oh god, this show has really gotten to me. I continue watching the show until my eyes feel heavy with sleep. I click pause and succumb to sleep.

**Thursday**

UGH! Why must I get up? I pick up my phone. I have three texts from Four. Great.

_4: I hope you believe its not true_

_4: once upon a time, something happened to me. It was the sweetest thing that could ever be. A fantasy, a dream come true, it was the day that I met you._

That was actually the sappiest text ever.

_4: Are you okay?_

I can't believe he would ask that! He knows I'm not and it's all his fault, so I reply,

_Stop asking me I'm okay... I'm tired of lying._

It doesn't seem right that he would do that to me.

_4: Tris, its not true, if you just let me explain_

_T: You don't need to explain. I already know more than I wanted to._

I shut my phone off and cry. I fake sick so that I don't have to go to school. I lay in bed all day. It's not like I don't do anything, because that would just be boring. All day, I switch from watching Futurama, to watching MTV, to sleeping, to reading the Fault in Our Stars. Currently, I'm beginning season 3 of Futurama. I sigh. PATHETIC. To prove my point even further, I'm finishing off my third pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. I even played a couple of songs on Guitar Hero. I wish I could just curl into a ball and hide from my problems. But this is reality. Here, in reality, I'm miserable. I can't even talk to my friends about the breakup. They would just be like, "Wait, you were dating Four?" and then Uriah would get overprotective and everything would be a mess. Breakups hurt really bad, and I just started dating him yesterday. I need to think positive things like, what will this robot steal next? Or who's going to guest star next on Ridiculousness? Why are so many pregnant teens on Mtv? What will happen in TFiOS? Actually, I can't think that. I already read the book and I saw the movie four times. It probably isn't good that I am reading a sad book after a breakup. I reach over to my side table to get my Pepsi can, when I realize that I still have Four's Erudite badge. I slip on a blue shirt and put the badge on. I put the badge under my shirt, because my parents wouldn't really approve of their daughter sneaking into a high-tech government agency. My parents got home a little under an hour ago. I tell them that I am going to get soup, and they buy that story. I'm not so sure that it would have fooled Caleb, had he been down here. I grab a clipboard and a pen. I drive to Erudite without music. I scan the badge and go inside. It's about 7:30 right now and some of the Erudite are gone, but there are definitely way more than when Four and I were here. I quickly walk into the Dauntless Room, avoiding attention as much as possible. Nobody exactly wants to ask questions when someone is carrying a clipboard in a scientific place. I step out onto the rooftop, and jump into the hole. The net cradles me, and for once in these past couple days, I am losing myself. It feels good. That's all I want. To feel good. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. It smells like wind, sawdust, and something I can't make out, but I know it when I smell it. It is vague, but distinctly fresh and sweet... Like detergent. I open my eyes, and the stars seem more vibrant than usual. I want to sleep, to drift off to a place where problems are nonexistent and everything was perfect. I can't have that though. No, if I sleep, I'll get caught. I get caught, I'll probably get arrested. If I get arrested, my parents will want to know why I was there in the first place. I can't pin all of that on Four... Damn. Right now, I have to leave, and pick up soup. If I don't get soup, that entire plan would be screwed. I go to the closest place that sells soup, and get a carry-out bowl full of chicken noodle soup and a dinner roll. There was hardly any line and a lot of people working, so I was in and out in about three minutes. When I get home and I'm questioned about where I was, I lie and say that the line was long. I eat my soup, even though I didn't really want it, and then take a shower. I don't bother drying my hair, so I wrap it in a towel for a bit and then go to bed. I've been going to bed kind of early this week, a lot has happened. Things this week have come, and gone as quick as they came. Whatever.

**Friday**

I am in desperate need of this week to end. Thank the ever loving lord that its over. I am going to hang out with Uriah today, I almost forgot. I'll need to pull myself together and put myself out there. See a couple friends, get wasted at clubs. Yeah, no. I've never been too fond of alcohol. I don't even care that Four left me. No, I'm pissed that he lied to me. I walk to school with Caleb, like any other normal Friday. But unlike any other normal Friday, my clothes, usually cute and nice, are like my Monday clothes. Shitty and boring. "Beatrice, why are you so upset?" Caleb asks. Shit. "I'm fine." I try to sound confident, and I straighten up my posture. "Okay." We don't speak for the rest of the walk. My schedule this morning goes homeroom, math, then music, chemistry, and then art. Then lunch, and the rest of sucky classes I was required to take. Math wasn't too bad, I basically just tuned out the lecture. When I get to music, the only people in the room so far, is Uriah, Will, Marlene, Lynn, and other people I don't know. Ms. Wu, Tori, as she tells us to call her because Ms. Wu makes her feel old, sits on a stool in the corner of the room. I take a seat and wait for the rest of the class to come in. Christina comes in and sits next to me. I see Four come in and sit in the back corner. "Today we will be doing duets!" Tori calls out. "The picks are fair, it's all from a hat, or in our case, this plastic pail." She holds up a pail. "It has each of your names in it, and I'm having one of you pick. If you don't get your best friend, calm down. You aren't marrying the person, said every teacher ever. No but seriously, don't freak out." She says. "Okay, lets start! Lynn, why don't you pick?" Lynn rolls her eyes a bit, but comes to the front anyway. She draws the first name. "Peter." She says blankly. "And," she pauses to pull another. "And- shit, me." She scoffs. "Alright, just go make a line over there," Tori says pointing. "Marlene, come pick!" She pulls out two names at once. "Zeke and Drew." "Uriah! Get up here!" Tori calls. Uriah pulls a name. "Eric and Cara." He says. More names are pulled by people I don't know, calling people I don't know. I sit here waiting for my name patiently, while the others lean against the radiator on the wall. I hear a familiar name. "Four," he walks up. "Will and Gus." **(A/N: I just had to!) **He walks away and sits back down. "Christina, you pick." Tori says. Christina pulls the first name. "Four," she pauses to pluck the next name. "And," I see her tiny bit of shock for a second. "Tris." Oh shit. Why?! I take a frustrated deep breath. We walk up to the line. "Look, Tris-" he says only quietly enough for me to hear. I hold up a finger near his face. "Shut the fuck up for one minute, please!" He does. Once everyone is picked, Tori says, "Okay, everyone find a spot and discuss your song." We do. "Tris, I swear it's no-" Four starts. "Can we not talk about this? Can we just focus on the song?" He nods. We start throwing out ideas and then dismissing them because its 'too shitty' or 'that song is annoying and overplayed'. We never decide on a song. "Time's up! Tris and Four!" Tori calls. "Wanna go first?" You can't say no to Tori. "Yeah, sure." I say. "We didn't really get to pick out a song, so my shuffle on my phone will pick." I say to the class. I hook up the phone to the speaker. I have a lot of songs on my phone, so this really is a shot in the dark. It takes me about a minute to get into my music. I scroll to the top. There it is. The infamous shuffle button. My hand hovers over it, as if I had an option. No option. No turning back. I tap the button. Oh no... The song starts. Dark Horse. "Yeah y'all know what it is. Katy Perry! Juicy J. Uh huh. Lets rage." Four sings- well raps. I know where this is going. "I knew you were, you were gonna come to me and here you are but you better choose carefully cause I, I'm capable of anything, of anything, and everything. Make me your Aphrodite, make me your one and only. But don't make me your enemy. Your enemy. Your enemy! So you wanna play with magic? Boy you should know what you're falling for. Baby do you dare to do this? Cause I'm comin at you like a dark horse. Are you ready for, ready for, a perfect storm, perfect storm? Cause once your mine, once your mine..." I belt out. "There's no goin back." The entire class and I sing. "Mark my words, this love will make you levitate like a bird, like a bird without a cage, it doesn't hurt, if you choose to walk away, don't walk away. It's in the palm of your hand now baby it's a yes or a no, no maybe. So just be sure, before you give it all to me, all to me, give it all to me!" I sing turning towards him. We were a good ten feet apart. "So you wanna play with magic? Boy, you should know what you're falling for. Baby, do you dare to do this? Cause I'm comin at you like a dark horse. Are you ready for, ready for, a perfect storm, perfect storm? Cause once your mine, once your mine..." "There's no goin back." I sing with the class. "Uh, she's a beast. I call her karma." Four starts. Damn. He's good at rapping too. "Comeback!" I say. "She'll eat your heart out, like Jeffery Dahmer." "Woo" I say. This gets a few giggles. "Be careful, try not to lead her on." He raps. "Mmm-mmm!" I say. "Shorty's heart is on steroids cause her love is so strong, you may fall in love when you meet her!" He says. We are inches apart now. "Meet her." I say. "If you get the chance you better keep her!" He says. "Keep her!" Christina yells out. I smile. "She swings by, but if you break her heart, she turns as cold as a freezer," "Freezer!" "That fairy tale ending with a knight in shining armor, she can be my sleeping beauty, I'm gon put her in a coma," he says. Yep. Good. "Woo!" He turns towards me and there is about six inches between us. I stare into those eyes. "Damn I think I love her, shorty so bad, I'm sprung and I don't care, she ride me like a roller coaster, turned the bedroom into a fair," "a fair!" I'm blushing now. "Her love is like a drug I was tryna hit and quit it, but lil' mama so dope I messed around and got addicted!" He finishes. "So you wanna play with magic? Boy, you should know what you're falling for. Baby, do you dare to do this? Cause I'm comin at you like a dark horse. Are you ready for, ready for, ready for, a perfect storm, perfect storm? A perfect storm?! Cause once your mine, once your mine ohh!" I sing. "There's no goin back." We are still standing in our same spot, gasping for breath, just staring at each other, and then I remember. But I just can't bring myself to do it. I can't bring myself to look away. I can feel the tension between us. I don't want to kiss him, like those cliché parts in movies. I don't know if he wants to kiss me, but I don't think I can ever forgive him, never mind kiss him. My gaze is broken by the first clap. The applause erupts throughout the classroom. We even get some standing ovations. It feels good. We walk back to our seats, and none of the other duets get as much applause as we do. "I hope you enjoyed today's duets, you'll be working with these people for the rest of the month, maybe longer if I like the pairing." Tori says. "I know, I know, 'ugh shit, Tori you suck! You're the worst! I've heard it all. You will get over it, trust me. Now, get out, we'll finish duets tomorrow." I'm working with Four for a month? Thanks, Chris! Chemistry was easy, unless you count Ms. Matthew's countless attempts to try and get me to understand why salt was 'NaCl' on the periodic table. I don't even understand why the hell we have government staff as teachers. They can't just hire some shady homeless guy for minimum wage? No, it has to be the best of the best. Art class. Our art teacher is usually Ms. Reyes, but her and Tori switch positions sometimes, for what reason, I don't know. "Okay, guys, so I have to finish lesson planning, just free draw for now." I like art, and music, because I am more talented at them than any other subject. I start drawing mindlessly. There is a slanted line so far. The line eventually turns into a pair of cupped hands. I don't know how. I draw a flame just above the hands. Ms. Reyes says, "May I show the class?" I nod and hand her the paper. She holds it up. "This is potential! I expect this from all of you!" She says smiling. I wonder what Four drew. Four sits near the pencil sharpener, so that's where I go. I make sure not to make eye contact with him. I start grinding up my pencil in the manual sharpener instead of the the electric one. I twist my head around and see the side of what Four is working on. He is drawing a teddy bear in a basket.

_Flashback, Beatrice; age 9_

Tobias and I have been hanging out for about a week and I decided to take him out on a picnic for his birthday. "Where should it be?" He told me to meet him by the small pond, not far from where we live. Possibly not even a half a mile. "I'll bring everything." I say. Nobody has ever listened to me as much as he does. I reach the pond in about five minutes, and set down the basket. I have a gift for him, but nothing special. I take out the box and hand it to him. "Happy Birthday," I smile. "Oh! Beatrice, you didn't have to get me anything," I push the box closer to him. "Oh, shut up, you know I did. Even if I didn't have to I still would have!" He smiles. "Open it!" I say. He starts to carefully tear the wrapping paper. "It's not much..." I say. He looks in the box and takes each thing out carefully. The first thing he takes out is a small sketch pad. He told me he loved drawing, and writing, which is why the next thing he took out was a leather backed journal with a big "T" stitched into it. I also got him a digital camera and a bag of cherries. (I got this together this morning). He pulls out a little teddy bear. This one was kind of special. "It's one of those bears that tells you a story about what kind of person you are on the inside tag. Some of these are really strange, like its fortunes have supposedly come true." There is a six on the foot. It must be the sixth one. He opens the tag and reads it.

_You are are a sweet, caring person, but you don't show it. You have a tough exterior and a soft inside. You are somewhat isolated but open up to your friends that trust and need you. You have a tender heart, and a way with words. You may be artistically talented, or you just enjoy artwork. _

He pauses. "Did you like, customize this?" I shake my head. He continues.

_Fortune: You will eventually put up walls, only to have them knocked down. You will have some association with the number six._

"That's a weird fortune." He says. He hugs me. "Thanks Beatrice. I appreciate it." I smile. "No problem, you're my best friend." "Hey there's a six on the paw!" We laugh. We eat and he puts the bear in the basket.

_Present, Tris; art class _

I almost trip and fall. He remembers that bear? The bear is perfect. He wrote the number 6 on a paw. He remembers? I need to get out of this class before I cry. "Okay! Class dismissed!" Mrs. Reyes says. I book it to lunch and find Christina. We wait in line for food together, but our usual table, usually half empty is filled up with our friends friends, and our friends's friends boyfriends and girlfriends, if that made any sense. "Shall we sit?" She points to open seats next to Four. Of all the places. "Is there anywhere-" I start. "No." I scan the cafeteria. Full. This is the one day of the year that everyone shows up. I sit down next to Four and he looks a little shocked. He looks at me, but then away just as fast. After a couple minutes, Christina goes to the bathroom, and I'm left here with Four. "Tris, just let me ex-" he starts. "No! Okay? I don't need an explanation! You cheated and now your feeling the guilt of it!" I turn away. "That's not it. Can you not cut me off? Tris just listen-" He says. "No! Okay?" "Tris..." I ignore him. Christina comes back. "So anyway..." She starts talking but I really couldn't hear her. I was too caught up in my thoughts. The rest of the day goes by slow but I ignore it. I sprint home and hop on my bed. Shit. I'm with Uriah today. I finish up my homework and get dressed. I drive to Uri's and knock on the door. Zeke answers it with a red solo cup in his hand splashing it on the floor as he does so. Loud music plays inside, and the house is filled up. He takes a huge gulp of whatever's in the cup. "Tris!" Zeke says. "Uriah's in the basement!" He yells over the noise. I go downstairs. "Sorry, I forgot Zeke's party was today." Uriah says. "So you have the option. Do you want to go upstairs to the party or just chill down here? We have video games... Checkers..." Uriah says. "I want to go upstairs." I've never been to a party. I think this will be a good first. A good way to get my mind off... You know who. "Oh," he looks taken back. "Okay." We walk up the stairs, and into the party. Someone shoves a cup of a brown liquid into my hand. I smell it. Alcohol. Brown plus alcohol equals beer probably. I taste it. It burns my mouth and leaves a sort of tingly sensation. I ignore the strange feeling and drink some more. I need to fit in here. "Whoa, take it easy there," Uriah says as I take another gulp. Zeke stands on a table clumsily, clearly buzzed and makes an announcement. "Kay! We're playing truth or dare, so if you don't wanna play, keep the fuck away from us." About 30 people go to the opposite side of the house. So that leaves my group, who must have just known to show up, and some of Zeke's friends. "Okay!" He says as we sit in a circle. "Truth or dare... Four?" He nods. God dammit, he's here? "Dare." "Kiss your crush." Zeke says. Four takes off his jacket. Thank god. Some turns pass until I hear my name. It's said by Lynn. "Tris, you know the question..." I nod. "Dare...?" "I dare you to try and out-drink Uri!" There are some whoops, and I'm seriously considering taking off this cardigan, but instead, I nod confidently. Zeke gets 20 shots of whiskey for us each."First to puke or pass out loses." Zeke says. "And... Go!" Uri and I start picking them up left and right and dumping them down our throats. Ew, this is really gross, but I can't show defeat. I finish my tenth one and I seriously feel like I am dying, but I don't need to go on, Uriah's done. He just threw up. I'm drunk now, not good. "Hehehe!" I fake high pitch girly giggle. "Ezekiel!" He flushes pink. "T or D?" I slur. "D!" He half-slurs. "Seven minutes with Shaunnaaaa!" I drag out. Seven minutes passes, and when we open the closet door, they are making out, like really passionately, so we shut the door. They come out soon enough, and Zeke passes the question to Four. "7 minutes. Tris. Now. Go." Four was currently in his shirt and underwear, because he was asked things like his name, fears, etc. He takes me to the closet. Everything is so bright and happy and just... Fuzzy. "Tris, sorry. You don't have to kiss me, we can just sit here. You know what, you don't have to look at me if you don't want to-" I kiss him, cause why not? He kisses back lightly, but then almost instantly pushes me away. I go back in, but he turns his face and lightly pushes me away again. "Come on!" I whine. "Tris, no. This isn't what you want. You're drinking, and it's not fair to you if I take advantage of it." I pull on his collar with one hand and play with the hem of his shirt with the other hand. I slide my hand up a few inches, and touch his muscular stomach. It's seriously like ripped. He flinches and jerks away, slightly reddening. "Tris, no!" He moves to the opposite corner and waits. Zeke comes in a couple minutes later and drags us- more me than him- out. I remember going to sit at Uriah's and Zeke's bar, and taking a shot of vodka. I beckon Four over, and slide a shot over to him. He looks down at the small glass, pondering his decision. He takes it, dumps it in his mouth, and carefully places the glass back down. "You need to stop drinking tonight, you're gonna get sick." I take a beer that had been left there and lift it a few inches above my head as I dump it in my mouth. Being my drunken self, I pour it on my face a lot. Then, I fall off the stool and black out. That's when I remember. Life is something to cherish. I may have just fucked mine up.

**A/N: hey! Sorry for not updating, but I'm working on a new story now, so um, yeah, check it out when it's posted. Hope you liked this, I'm not so sure about it but I tried! Anyway it might be a bit before another update on this story, so hang tight!**

**~B**


	5. help (not an update)

hey guys, not a chapter, sorry. I don't really plan on updating this soon... or ever really? but don't lose hope to the six people who read this, because i might update. I just have a lot going on and im hardly ever on ffnet anymore and this story was kind of garbage. i really did like it at first and planned on finishing it, but as time went on, I grew away from it and lost interest. the plot seemed too rushed and everything and if i do update (which i may) i will fix previous chapters. i'm never one to leave without an ending (especially on the note i left it on, like what the fuck are you doing bailey?) but i just feel like im beating a dead horse and it might be time to abandon this story.

for any of you who were reading this, you might want to check out my wattpad, SuperiorEmo, where i actually update somewhat regularly.

I am very sorry to anybody who looked forward to an ending and enjoyed my story, but you might see one in the future. I just don't want any of my work to not be the best of my abilities. So, carry on with your daily activities, and again, I am sorry, but maybe their will be a new update/editing old chapters as a holiday gift :) (NO FALSE HOPE PLZ)

rip:you reflect me 2014 [i think]-2015

you will be missed

-bailey


	6. Forgiveness, Can You Imagine?

**A/N: So, I originally planned on writing this full scene, but it didn't end up happening but yo? I updated?! Guys, I hope you like this, as its still gonna be a while till my next update. Anyways, without further ado...**

**Tris**

I wake up, slightly, to the sound of beeping. My vision is blurred and I really can't see for a second. Almost everything is white around me. Sterile. I internally groan. I conclude that I am in the hospital. My head is pounding, and I press an IV ridden hand to my forehead. I can't believe I almost died, and over a _boy. _I almost died over a silly boy. He may have been my best friend at one point, and my "boyfriend" at another, but I was not prepared to die for him. A small cough surprises me. Of course Four is here. Why wouldn't he want to make my day worse? Wait- what day is it? "What day is it?" I groan (again), rubbing my eyes. "Sunday." His voice is small, like he didn't want me to interrupt him or yell at him. My sleepy daze is broken after hearing his response. "I've been sleeping for a day?" He nods. There is silence.

"I'm still mad at you."

He sighs in desperation. "Please, let me explain, since you really have nowhere to run off to," He says, motioning to the various machines that I'm hooked up to. I don't answer him. "Lauren, she was my ex, and she still wants to get back together with me. I refuse to allow that. She gets really jealous now and then, but honestly she can be very supportive and I'm sure that eventually she'll support me, support us." I raise an eyebrow. "Why _wouldn't_ you get back together with her? She is literally the it girl of this godforsaken school, every guy wants her." He smiles coyly. "I've found myself utterly infatuated with _you_, Beatrice Prior." I shake my head. "Why did you bully me for four years?" He looks at his feet. "I didn't want to admit it to myself..." I exhale, annoyed. "Admit what?" And then he looks up at me. He looks up with this sad, pathetic, _pleading _look in his eyes, and I believe everything he's told me.

"I didn't want to admit that I was in love with my best friend."

A little breath shudders in my throat, and I stare at him with my jaw slightly agape.

"After all this time?"

"Always."

At that moment, he takes my hand. "Tris, why're you so nervous?"He laughs. I blush. "I'm not." "Your heart monitor says otherwise." He says, motioning to the spikes on my monitor. I turn my face away, flushing red. "You still make me feel this way," I didn't want to say that, despite its truth. He pauses anxiously. "You and I both know that, but God, I'm not ready for a relationship, Tobias."

**Tobias**

She's not mad at me. "Tris, I promise you- I'll respect any decision you make and- and..." Why I am so desperately grasping for words, is beyond me, but I try to continue. "I'm willing to wait for it. For you." She smiles, a shy smile, but I can tell she knows I mean it. I breathe out, relieved. I gently touch her hand, the one that has an IV in it. She says nothing, but she also doesn't pull away. There is a quiet reassurance, and she looks out the window, my hand on hers. I definitely could've imagined it, but I'll go to my grave swearing that she whispered a soft "thank you" as she entangled her hand with mine.

**A/N: Ah, short little chapter, but it's an update. Stay tuned for another, probably months from now as I'm definitely sort of out of content. But hey, I hope you guys like this! (ps. those ;) references;) in;) there;))**


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